Sled Dog Skippy

Cynics unite! And then quickly disband.

In case you haven’t noticed, I have been quite the whiner lately. No days off, working at a (sometimes crummy) second job, being tired, whah whah whah. I realize that, in the words of a friend here, I have been “emoting, not complaining.” This has been my mantra for the past several months so that I can be in denial about turning into a frozen, tired, cynical jerk face. Okay, I say that “I’m emoting” has been my mantra for the past several months. That is a gross understatement. It has been my mantra since my plane landed here in March.

So now it is time, after having kvetched with my fellow cynics around the country, to start looking at things differently. I present to you, a list of good things (similar to TMC’s “A gagillion things to be happy about“):

  • I HAVE A JOB. MY HUSBAND HAS A JOB. In terms of the greater economy, you know, the one that exists outside my Alaskan bubble, I am very very fortunate. My first job is essential to another person. It is very unlikely that the boss lady could care for 42 dogs on her own without going bat-shit crazy like I did this summer. It is possible for several months, but not for the long-term. I feel like my dog job is secure. If ever she was unable to pay us our paltry wage, we would at least still have housing and utilities. I’d take that. My second job is also secure as I perform the essential function of making sure people and our agency gets paid by the government. I think the government and services for people with developmental disabilities are here to stay.
  • I live in a comfortable cabin that has heat, electricity, internet (gasp!) and a way to store water. My house is not in danger of being foreclosed.
  • I went mushing yesterday. I went down the Gulley of Doom with the boss and 9 dogs. I didn’t even know I went down the Gulley of Doom until we were coming back the opposite direction and we were being pulled up an INCREDIBLY steep incline by the on-fire dogs. The boss lady now knows NOT to warn me of impeding doom. Except for tree branches to the face and legs.
  • Before I went mushing I had 45 glorious minutes to MYSELF. I am not alone anymore, except for the stressful, radio-free, dark, icy commute to work each day. It was becoming apparent that I had no time to myself in my feeble attempts to use what I like to call Cat Hearing. You know, where you only respond to cues related to food & sleeping. I can only try to ignore someone who is speaking directly to me for 3 days, not 4. I’ve tried.
  • I saw an amazing local production of The Nutcracker last night. This was the town of Homer’s 20th anniversary production and I couldn’t stop smiling. Classically trained ballet dancers, adorable children and of course, Tchaikovsky, all make my face hurt from smiling. I found myself tearing up in almost every scene. I am very proud and happy to live in a town that wants to put so much effort, time, and money into preserving this whimsical ballet. At first glance, Homer seems like a touristy fishing town with some art galleries. The people are kind of crazy and eccentric. Sometimes the feeling of “fend for yourself” and “not in my backyard!” are palpable. But last night’s sold out production at the high school showed the very different, special, and talented side of the town in which I live.
  • My husband is amazing & intelligent. Don’t tell him that or his head will get bigger. I love watching him formulate a plan and become excited about the plan. He’s pretty moderate with most emotions and responses, which is helpful to counter my erractic moods and impulsiveness. However, seeing him light up when he talks about life changes is refreshing.
  • Sun. Sunshine is good.
  • Seeing the biggest full moon since 1993 on a clear night lighting up the snow was amazing.
  • Getting Wednesday nights off (yes, evenings off after 8 MONTHS, people) to go to yoga class in a beautiful building with a wonderful and helpful teacher. Hearing & saying the word “om” and having it vibrate my body, the way it is supposed to do, while feeling deep connection to strangers. I have never felt that before, only hoped.
  • Cheap tangerines.

Anytime you read some cynical and grumpy words from me, link me back to myself. It will serve as the smack to the forehead I need to be thankful for the life I live.

3 Responses to “Cynics unite! And then quickly disband.”

  1. Sara P. says:

    My favorite post so far.

    - Your fellow emoting person

  2. Skippy says:

    Sara P,

    I miss you! Barrrrroooooooooooooo! (sad dog howl)

  3. MK says:

    I simply adore your sassy, cynical self!!

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